Some days, we just cant meet.
Time allowed us some space to see each other at some other places, but someone just doesnt wan it, what else can i do?
It's been the how many time i rejected him .......
Probably, I shouldnt have gave in as early as the 2nd day. At least holding on till the present might be good for us. BUT, it's too late now - unless we return to BOX 1 again and be sincere and innocent to one another.
It's hurts sometimes, I find it difficult to move on, I'm stuck, I'm fragile - Like an broken ankle where dance is impossible in the lovely studio.
*********************************
Some of his words reminds me - DON'T YOU DARE TO FORGET THAT YOU ARE A DANCER.
That day, he was so serious talking bout "WHAT IS DANCE" when I just wanna chat bout different type of dance, with and without mirror.
From his sentence, I saw myself when I was 17, the fellow who was once so serious in dance, where mirror is the correction for mistakes.
When I was 17, I tot mirror was super duple important for a Comtemporary Dancer until 21, I realised that with or without mirror, the most important for a Comtemporary Dancer is FEELING & ENERGY.
Since he was so fierce bout the conversation, I asked him what is his definition of dance. He told me PERFECTION. Somehow I agree (but that doesnt mean he have to talk in a arrogant way!).
I cant share with him my opinion since he was so strong about his definition. This had alr shown that he doesnt wanna listen, thr's no point sharing at the end of the day.
I told him to treat that I din ask before bout places to practise dance. It was a bad conservation with him as a friend that late morning. Sucks!
Sometimes, I just prefer we treat each other as dancer rather than fling. At least I can concentrate on what I always love to do, instead of thinking this and that which I'm sick and tired of it (but I have no idea why I am still thinking bout it now and then)
Fifth December this year, an date to rmb :)
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Images of the day
Took half day leave to attend an interview at Old School Sinema as Event Trainee. Before that, met up with Hajar at Lasalle. After interview, went to take pictures around Mount Sophia, this place never fail to give me feelings for photography despite the hot hot sun.
Peep into their dance studio turn out to be stepping into :)
The carpet is much better than my school, good spacing as well, of course, not forgetting to take PICTURESSSSSSSS :D
Somehow, I still think bout the transition from the time I was in Lasalle to NYP. If I din quit Lasalle, I wouldnt have met him. If I din quit Lasalle, I wouldnt have a chance to be a cometmporary dancer (was in Faculty of Fine Arts). If I din enroll to Lasalle, I wouldnt have been so attach to Mc Nally Road now. If I din enroll into NYP, I maybe leading a full artist life (upside down) and never learn new stuffs beside ARTS :)
Nevertheless, I am still welcome to be a Exhibitor Crew during my free time in Lasalle :)
Lovely Sunset at Mount Sophia, exploration with my big big shade.
Staircase remains to be my favourite place
€
Farewell !
Peep into their dance studio turn out to be stepping into :)
The carpet is much better than my school, good spacing as well, of course, not forgetting to take PICTURESSSSSSSS :D
Somehow, I still think bout the transition from the time I was in Lasalle to NYP. If I din quit Lasalle, I wouldnt have met him. If I din quit Lasalle, I wouldnt have a chance to be a cometmporary dancer (was in Faculty of Fine Arts). If I din enroll to Lasalle, I wouldnt have been so attach to Mc Nally Road now. If I din enroll into NYP, I maybe leading a full artist life (upside down) and never learn new stuffs beside ARTS :)
Nevertheless, I am still welcome to be a Exhibitor Crew during my free time in Lasalle :)
Lovely Sunset at Mount Sophia, exploration with my big big shade.
Staircase remains to be my favourite place
€
Farewell !
Monday, October 26, 2009
my 4th chance appear :)
I'm gonna cherish it.
However, someone is gonna crash it!
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would love to declare but not at the moment when we both are not sure if we shld get tgt..
I dun care about what the future holds as long as I have my present, my short moment with him is good enough to turn into memories for the future.
I'm gonna cherish it.
However, someone is gonna crash it!
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would love to declare but not at the moment when we both are not sure if we shld get tgt..
I dun care about what the future holds as long as I have my present, my short moment with him is good enough to turn into memories for the future.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
On the 25th of October, 2009
I seems to hate waiting lately, for some reason.
I guess, I've been waiting for most of my life (unimportant stuffs).
And went around for those important stuffs.
Perharps, this make my life getting complicated and complicated, but for no reason, I like the life I used to lead.
To date, it's a struggle without my MP 3, hopefully, it'll recover itself soon.
Reality caught me back for a week, despite listening to various radio station.
Dance seems to tell me tt I have the standard to dance better - felt like i was dancing for someone instead for myself - which i dislike sometimes. I rather dance for myself than others, putting myself 1st place and others 2nd.
Bad stuffs happened this afternoon.
Conclusion - I wasted few hours (waiting & going) and in return was no one really care bout what i did, kana hit on the head for no reason! BASTARD do that, cos no one have the right to hit me that harsh! of course i left immediately, only moron stays.
Phone went low batt, no radio, no mp 3, I took a bus home, passing my 1st ex-bf's house, that was my sunday afternoon.
Dial my ex's number but somehow, i cant rmb it and it wasnt in my phonebook....
Naturally, I walked to the dance studio at my community club and sat on the sofa outside for bout an hour, drinking honey bubble tea and eating potato chips, thinking bout the studio at the old CC which was just under the next block.
What came to my mind when i was down this evening was DANCE, though practises are getting tiring every week.
He seems to dissapear for a while and came back this morning. I am adapting to this and let everything goes as it wants, neither waiting nor forcing it anymore.
I guess, I've been waiting for most of my life (unimportant stuffs).
And went around for those important stuffs.
Perharps, this make my life getting complicated and complicated, but for no reason, I like the life I used to lead.
To date, it's a struggle without my MP 3, hopefully, it'll recover itself soon.
Reality caught me back for a week, despite listening to various radio station.
Dance seems to tell me tt I have the standard to dance better - felt like i was dancing for someone instead for myself - which i dislike sometimes. I rather dance for myself than others, putting myself 1st place and others 2nd.
Bad stuffs happened this afternoon.
Conclusion - I wasted few hours (waiting & going) and in return was no one really care bout what i did, kana hit on the head for no reason! BASTARD do that, cos no one have the right to hit me that harsh! of course i left immediately, only moron stays.
Phone went low batt, no radio, no mp 3, I took a bus home, passing my 1st ex-bf's house, that was my sunday afternoon.
Dial my ex's number but somehow, i cant rmb it and it wasnt in my phonebook....
Naturally, I walked to the dance studio at my community club and sat on the sofa outside for bout an hour, drinking honey bubble tea and eating potato chips, thinking bout the studio at the old CC which was just under the next block.
What came to my mind when i was down this evening was DANCE, though practises are getting tiring every week.
He seems to dissapear for a while and came back this morning. I am adapting to this and let everything goes as it wants, neither waiting nor forcing it anymore.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
BUSY
Probably the last sunset I've enjoyed at Marina Bay Platform on 17th Oct.
It seems like my holiday is ending very, very soon. 4days of dance practise - includes 1 full day practise on saturday from 9.30am to 4.30pm, sooner or later, it'll become 5 days of practises. All for the preparations of next year's performance.
Am enjoying this kind of life :)
work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance, work & dance....................
the same routine goes on.
Thursday is the only time where I have sometime for myself at night this week :)
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Ballet Slipper
Since 2004 when i last wore my ballet slipper .......
headed to costume shop to get a new size, accompanied by aloy followed by ice teh tarik at one of my fav indian cafe & Takashimaya's tent for Jewel Fest 09.
AM SO IN LOVE WITH MY NEW BALLET SLIPPER <3
Dance isnt easy.
To look good on stage isnt easy, practises, rehersals, practises, rehersals.
AM SO IN LOVE WITH MY NEW BALLET SLIPPER <3
Dance isnt easy.
To look good on stage isnt easy, practises, rehersals, practises, rehersals.
Practise practise and practise in the right way produce a good and tough dancer. Someone told me, A DANCER NEVER GIVE UP, which encourages me when the going gets tougher.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Eat Shop Eat Shop Spa
I'm falling in love with oyster <3
Oyster Omelette & Oyster Mee Sua are my fav current food which I'm craving for when I'm outdoor :) Not forgetting calm chowder soup when i'm at Plaza Sing
Missed chunky monkey so much!!! Acc by M & Ms on top of the ice cream. Shared with aloy after dinner at B1 at cathay :)
ON HOLIDAY ~
My shopping items on monday 5th Oct 2009 :)
Skinlite Mask being brought home on a friday evening while out with mummy. The scrub really works wonders on my skin as it remove the deadskin leaving a smooth touch, making my face feels fresh with the help of the mask :)
Prologue is a good place to hang out at nite at ION Orchard when one feels solitare - good books accompanied with romantic scenery <3
1st time getting foot fish spa with uncle sean and aloy, itcy but this spa really takes away the dead skins which were left on the feet :)
Oyster Omelette & Oyster Mee Sua are my fav current food which I'm craving for when I'm outdoor :) Not forgetting calm chowder soup when i'm at Plaza Sing
Missed chunky monkey so much!!! Acc by M & Ms on top of the ice cream. Shared with aloy after dinner at B1 at cathay :)
ON HOLIDAY ~
My shopping items on monday 5th Oct 2009 :)
Skinlite Mask being brought home on a friday evening while out with mummy. The scrub really works wonders on my skin as it remove the deadskin leaving a smooth touch, making my face feels fresh with the help of the mask :)
Prologue is a good place to hang out at nite at ION Orchard when one feels solitare - good books accompanied with romantic scenery <3
1st time getting foot fish spa with uncle sean and aloy, itcy but this spa really takes away the dead skins which were left on the feet :)
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Blackberry Digital Cinema
THE FUTURE OF COMMUNICATION
A project which invloves a lot of brainwaves and colour.
http://www.blackberrydigitalcinema.com
Midnight Shift
It's not about global or local divide. It's more bout music tt moves your souls, make sense in your head and feels good for the body
Monday, October 05, 2009
Weekend Rehab
WE MAKE NO MISTAKE, WE KNOW HOW TO CHERISH THE MOMENT WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER, AND WE SHOULD LET GO IF IT'S TIME TO .... AND PLACE OUR PAST IN A SPACE CALL - MEMORIES
Weekend stay over at changi v, in my friend's cafe. Waking up without washing up and breakfast, off we board the bus to LAN and harbour front to meet our friends for lunch.
i brought along my mini toliet :)
My new pink toothbrush from mummy :)
I finally know how to appreciate CHIVAS :)
The drunken siblings
comparing muscles when they have none -.-
The next morning off we board the bus for LAN and train to harbour front for lunch with our friends :)
Rehab at Sentosa, again. usual place with usual kakis :)
some one told me a sentence - we still have to step back to reality
which really wakes me up and encourage me to live up my life, again.
My crush, may not be the one for me, like i say, God only give me the best - if it's not the best, HE WILL TAKE AWAY. But i had never felt so much pain when i realised the true fact .....
i like him too much?
i put in too much effort even when i'm his fling?
i even thought of carrying his child .
but again, when i'm awake from all these blindness feelings, i asked myself, does he worth it? Do i really have to live that kind of life (which i was so tired of)? Imagine - giving up almost everything for him except for dance. Our love for dance is TOTALLY different - he love break dance, i love comtemporary. I admire ppl who dance BD cos of the impressive movement but tt doesnt gimme a reason to fall in love blindly!
anw, i guess, i need a few more days to wake up and move on in my life :)
Thanks to my usual kakis who acc me these few weeks <3
photo from lawrence chang
Weekend stay over at changi v, in my friend's cafe. Waking up without washing up and breakfast, off we board the bus to LAN and harbour front to meet our friends for lunch.
i brought along my mini toliet :)
My new pink toothbrush from mummy :)
I finally know how to appreciate CHIVAS :)
The drunken siblings
comparing muscles when they have none -.-
The next morning off we board the bus for LAN and train to harbour front for lunch with our friends :)
Rehab at Sentosa, again. usual place with usual kakis :)
some one told me a sentence - we still have to step back to reality
which really wakes me up and encourage me to live up my life, again.
My crush, may not be the one for me, like i say, God only give me the best - if it's not the best, HE WILL TAKE AWAY. But i had never felt so much pain when i realised the true fact .....
i like him too much?
i put in too much effort even when i'm his fling?
i even thought of carrying his child .
but again, when i'm awake from all these blindness feelings, i asked myself, does he worth it? Do i really have to live that kind of life (which i was so tired of)? Imagine - giving up almost everything for him except for dance. Our love for dance is TOTALLY different - he love break dance, i love comtemporary. I admire ppl who dance BD cos of the impressive movement but tt doesnt gimme a reason to fall in love blindly!
anw, i guess, i need a few more days to wake up and move on in my life :)
Thanks to my usual kakis who acc me these few weeks <3
photo from lawrence chang
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